Here at Waffle Productions© I strive to give you the best value when selling squeaky hamsters. Our hamsters are a natural resource, which means they're a 'gift if nature' and possibly a 'gift of pure AWESOMENESS!. The hamsters we produce are renewable, so we can replace all the ones we've bought. Remember, our hamsters are top qaulity so your hamster wont chip a tooth. We have lots of alternitaves when it comes to hamsters, like hamsters with rocket launchers so your little brother will scream like a little girl when you launch it at him. The demand for the hamsters are very high (because there so frickin awesome!) so buy now! Our company has a monopoly, and no, I'm not talking about that stupid little game, it means I am the only producer making squeaky hamsters, with like no competition. Our supply of hamsters is plentiful so you could probably buy 20 and throw them at your friends and say Merry Christmas in the middle of June!. Our price for all hamsters is way low so you wont murder the bank for money cause you want to buy some of our pure awesomeness. This is product is a want, so don't plan the hamster to the heimlich manuver when you choke on a window. We try to make some profit but our prices are still low! Be a good little consumer and buy now. Every now and then I offer incentives like little slingshots for launching your hamsters. Our hamsters will fit all your criteria. Like a scale out of one to ten, our awesomeness is a 20, coolness is a 10, awesomeness is 20.
